Why Some Women Are Attracted To Serial Killers Like Charles Manson

Strangely enough, some women see convicted murderers as “the perfect boyfriend."
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It may be hard to wrap your head around, but even after being convicted in the brutal killings of actress Sharon Tate and several others, cult leader Charles Manson still had women pursuing him romantically.

Three years ago, Manson ― who died Sunday after nearly five decades in prison ― became engaged to Afton Elaine Burton, a 26-year-old woman who went by the name Star and ran a website called Release Charles Manson Now.

The romance fizzled out. The couple’s marriage license expired in February 2015 amid tabloid rumors that Burton wanted to marry the killer so that she could put his body on display for profit after his death ― a claim her parents later denied.

Whatever Burton’s reasons for pursuing the relationship, when news broke about the pair’s engagement, the Internet couldn’t stop talking about the sexual phenomenon called hybristophilia or, as it’s sometimes called, Bonnie and Clyde syndrome. 

Hybristophilia is a sexual disorder in which arousal is contingent on being with a partner who has committed an outrage, such as rape, torture or murder,” Katherine Ramsland, a professor of forensic psychology at DeSales University and the author of The Forensic Psychology of Criminal Minds, explained in an interview with HuffPost.

But hybristophilia isn’t always what drives women and men to feel an attraction to killers. In fact, Ramsland told HuffPost it’s rarely to blame. 

“There are many other motives. Some women also seek fame by proxy, or believe they can tame the ‘wild beast’ in a violent man. A paraphilia is not typical,” she said, using the term for an abnormal sexual desire. “The woman engaged to Manson had [reportedly] hoped to exhibit his body ― that’s not a paraphilia, it’s exploitation.” 

Other women who dated serial killers actually did take the leap and get married. 

Ted Bundy, the notorious serial killer who raped and murdered more than 30 women, received tons of fan mail from female admirers while in jail. In 1980, while still on trial, Bundy married one of his admirers, twice-divorced mother of two Carole Anne Boone. (Bundy was executed for his crimes in 1989.)

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Bettmann via Getty Images
Ted Bundy, one of the most notorious serial killers in U.S. history, got married before he was executed in 1989.

In 1989, Richard Ramirez, aka “The Night Stalker,” was sentenced to death on charges that included 13 murders, five attempted murders and 11 sexual assaults. That didn’t deter freelance magazine editor Doreen Lioy from marrying him seven years later. (She called him kind, funny and charming.)

While there’s no one-size-fits-all profile for the type of women who would fall for a serial killer, they’ve usually experienced troubled childhoods, said Sheila Isenberg, an English professor and the author of Women Who Love Men Who Kill.

“Without exception, the women I interviewed for my book had all been involved in early abusive relationships,” Isenberg said. “Their families, first boyfriends, husbands or someone else had abused them either sexually, physically, emotionally.”

According to Isenberg, getting involved with an imprisoned criminal gives the women some semblance of power. 

“It’s a chance to be in control, often for the first time in their lives,” Isenberg told HuffPost. “They make the decisions, they are the ones with the freedom to come and go.”

It may seem counterintuitive, but “becoming involved with a violent convicted murderer feels safe for a woman who’s had an abusive past,” the writer said. “He’s behind bars; she’s not.”

“Many of these women believe they're the only one who can reach the ‘real’ person underneath the monster being falsely portrayed.”

- Oren Amitay, a psychologist in Toronto, Canada

In some ways, the convicted criminal is “the perfect boyfriend” for these women, Ramsland added. 

“The woman knows where he is at all times, and while she can now claim that someone loves her, she does not have to endure the day-to-day issues of most relationships,” she said. “She can keep the fantasy charged up for a long time, without having to cook, clean or report in to someone.”

That fantasy often includes the belief that only they know what their boyfriend is really like, said Oren Amitay, a Toronto-based psychologist.

“Many of these women believe they’re the only one who can reach the ‘real’ person underneath the monster being falsely portrayed,” Amitay said. “Only they can give their boyfriend the love and support he deserves, reveal his ‘true self’ and prove that he’s innocent, or at least misunderstood, to the public.”

“They may even take credit for 'reforming' him, as if their love was all he needed to change, the magical ingredient.”

- Katherine Ramsland, a professor of forensic psychology

Still, the desire for fame cannot be underestimated, Ramsland said. If you’re looking for quick celebrity status, dating a convicted murder will get you that.

“These people go on talk shows to proclaim their love and insist that the convicted murderer got a raw deal or is ‘different’ now,” she added. “They may even take credit for ‘reforming’ him, as if their love was all he needed to change, the magical ingredient.”

In cases of death sentences, the women’s part of the story continues after their partner is gone.

“These women get to participate in the drama of a trial and the appeals process ― and perhaps even the execution,” Ramsland said.

As for Burton, in January, her parents claimed she tried to see Manson while he was severely ill but was thwarted by the hospital. In her father’s words, the former couple were “still friends.” 

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Before You Go

Infamous Serial Killers
Jeffrey Dahmer(01 of15)
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Notorious cannibal Jeffrey Dahmer sits with his defense team during his 1991 trial. Dahmer went on a killing spree in the 1980s during which he murdered 17 men and boys. He often had sex with the corpses before dismembering them and, in some cases, ate pieces of human flesh. After his conviction, Dahmer was killed by a fellow inmate in prison. (credit:AP)
John Wayne Gacy(02 of15)
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John Wayne Gacy was arrested in 1978 after murdering 33 men and boys. He was known as the "Killer Clown" for his work as a children's entertainer. When Gacy became the suspect in a young man's disappearance, he invited police to his home for coffee. Cops noticed a smell that could emanate from a decaying body. They returned with a search warrant and found 29 victims stuffed into crawlspaces. (credit:Des Plaines Police Department / Getty Images)
David Berkowitz(03 of15)
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David Berkowitz, the "Son of Sam" killer, terrorized New York with six murders and several other shootings that ended with his 1977. When police arrested him, Berkowitz, a mailman, said his neighbor's dog commanded him to strike. He's in Sing Sing prison In New York serving life, though he's eligible for parole. (credit:AP)
Angelo Buono(04 of15)
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Angelo Buono, a 47 year old auto upholsterer, sits in a Los Angeles courtroom Monday March 2, 1982 as he listens to opening arguments in the so called "Hillside Stranglings" case in which Buono is accused of killing 10 women and girls in the Los Angeles area between 1977 and 1978. (credit:AP)
Ted Bundy(05 of15)
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Ted Bundy at one time in the 1970s had a bright future in the Washington State Republican Party, but instead became one of the most famous serial killers and necrophiliacs. He often deceived his victims, all women, into thinking that he was injured and in need of help before attacking them. In 1976 he was arrested for an attempted kidnapping, but while acting as his own lawyer, he escaped. He migrated to Tallahassee where he killed two women in a Florida State University sorority house. He was convicted of those murders and while on death row in 1989 he confessed to 50 other murders. Correction: A previous version of this slide misstated the location of the Florida State murders as Pensacola, Fla. (credit:AP)
Aileen Wuornos(06 of15)
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Aileen Wuornos admitted to killing six men while she worked as a prostitute in Florida in 1989 and 1990. She initially claimed that she acted in self defense against johns who raped her or tried to rape her. But later she admitted that she robbed and killed in cold blood and would do it again if she were free. She was executed in 2002. (credit:Florida Department of Corrections / AP)
Anthony Sowell (07 of15)
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Anthony Sowell was convicted and sentenced to death in 2011 for killing 11 women and keeping their remains in his Cleveland home. (credit:Chuck Crow, AP)
Richard Ramirez(08 of15)
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In this file photo taken Oct. 24, 1985, "Night Stalker" Richard Ramirez displays a pentagram symbol on his hand inside a Los Angeles courtroom. The California Supreme Court Monday< Aug. 7, 2006, upheld the convictions and death sentence for serial killer Richard Ramirez, the so-called "Night Stalker" whose killing spree terrorized the Los Angeles area in the mid 1980s. Ramirez, now 46, was sentenced to death in 1989 for 13 Los Angeles-area murders committed in 1984 and 1985. Satanic symbols were left at some murder scenes and some victims were forced to "swear to Satan" by the killer, who broke into homes through unlocked windows and doors. (AP Photo/Lennox McLendon) (credit:Lennox McLendon, AP)
Andrew Cunanan(09 of15)
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Andrew Cunanan is seen in this 1997 mugshot from the FBI. Cunanan murdered five men from Minneapolis to Miami, including fashion designer Gianni Versace. As investigators closed in on him, Cunanan committed suicide in 1997. (credit:FBI / Getty Images)
Ed Gein(10 of15)
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Edward Gein, 51, of Plainfield, Wisc. enters Central State Hospital for the Criminally Insane Nov. 23,1957, in Milwaukee. Gein admitted to slaying two women and dismembering their bodies as well as robbing graves. Gein flayed the bodies and used human skin and other body parts to decorate furniture and clothing in his decrepit farmhouse. His twisted tale was the inspiration for murders in movies like Buffalo Bill from "The Silence of the Lambs." (credit:AP)
Gary Ridgway(11 of15)
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Gary Ridgeway slew 48 women in the Seattle area from 1982 to 1998. He was known as the Green River Killer, because his first five victims were found near the waterway. The case was one of the longest unsolved murder mysteries in the country, not to mention one of the bloodiest. Ridgeway pleaded guilty in 2003 and was sentenced to life in prison without parole. (credit:Elaine Thompson, AP)
Albert Fish(12 of15)
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Albert Fish was a child rapist and cannibal who confessed to torturing hundreds of children, beginning in 1880 in New York. He was convicted and sentenced to death in 1935, however, for the murder of a single girl, 10-year-old Grace Budd. During the trial, Fish said he heard voices in his head that told him to attack children.

CORRECTION: A previous version of this slide incorrectly stated that Budd was the daughter of Fish's employee.
(credit:AP)
Coral Eugene Watts(13 of15)
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Early on his life, Coral Eugene Watts was identified by psychiatrists as a dangerous and violent individual. He lived up to those warnings as the so-called Sunday Morning Slasher and confessed to killing 80 women in Michigan, Texas and Canada in the late 1970s and early 1980s. He strangled, drowned, stabbed and beat his victims. He died in 2007 in prison from prostate cancer while serving a life sentence for two of the Michigan murders. (credit:Paul Sancya, AP)
Richard Angelo(14 of15)
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Richard Angelo, a nurse at Good Samaritan Hospital in New York, killed 25 patients in a bungled plan to turn himself into a hero. Angelo injected patients with a cocktail of dangerous drugs with the plan of restoring them to life and burnishing his reputation as a life-saving medical professional. Only 12 patients survived the "Angel of Death." (credit:AP)
Joseph Naso(15 of15)
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This is an undated booking photo released by the Washoe County Sheriff's office showing Joseph Naso. Authorities in California and Nevada plan to release more information about Naso, the 77-year-old man accused in four homicides spanning two decades. Naso, of Reno, Nev., was booked late Monday, April 11, 2011, on suspicion of the killings in 1977, 1978, 1993 and 1994. (credit:Washoe County Sheriff's office / AP)

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