Thursday 23 September - Mens A - 3Bs

We lost 7 - 2 but I have a warm glow inside! ... not one of those sexy glows that you sometimes get when you wear a skin tight rubber suit (... or so Fred was telling me in the bar tonight!), but just a warm glow of pride in being a member of our club.

Mind you I don't know why I feel like that. When I first saw the likes of Dave Bone and Michael Ford waiting to play against us in our first Men's A , I thought Oh Bugger !!!!!!. I remember playing against them last season in the cup and it wasn't pretty, (well our team were, but not in a badminton sense).

Anyway, the match was a daunting prospect against some pretty awesome opposition, but I tell you what, I had the best night of badminton for a long time. It was an absolute pleasure to play against such class players. The whole team raised their games on the night and gave a very good account of ourselves. We lost the match overall which was expected, but we battled hard and all six players from Marlborough played some great badminton.

Steve and I lost 4 & 9 to the first pair but had some great rallies, and lost 4 & 9 in the last. Again with Steve's power play we were improving all the time, and we actually won our middle game in three.

Fred and Kyle lost to 8 & 5 in their first, 7 & 5 in their second, but as we did went to three in their other match and won. The combination of power and touch of our second pair was proving a potent combination, and again some of the rallies against top players were a joy to watch.

Ian and Simon lost 3 & 7, 4 & 8 and 4 & 4 to their top pair, but again gave a great account of themselves. I think Simon actually cut the last game short because he had a bottle of wine in his bag that was calling to him, otherwise, the way they were both playing, the last game should have gone on longer!

And all of this happened in front of a capacity crowd of 35,721 ... well it wasn't quite that much but the club night was packed and it gave the whole evening a wonderful atmosphere to have so many people there encouraging you and showing an interest ... and that brings me back to my warm glow. We lost tonight but I was so proud of the team. We looked bloody good at times, and although we will probably lose most of our Division 1 matches this year, it 's such a buzz playing against quality opposition, and I am convinced that this experience will improve our game and rub off on the rest of the club.

... what size is that suit Fred?

Friday 15 October - Mens A - Bicester

Like the late great Brian Clough said, "If God had meant football to be played in the air, he would have put grass in t' clouds" and if he had seen our Badminton match on Friday night he would have added, "... and if God had meant men to play Badminton, he would have welded long metal fly swat things to the end of our arms, (which would have been eight feet long), and made our limbs bend and flex in all sorts of positions with awesome speed and accuracy, as well as given us the ability to teleport from one end of the court to the other instantly and at the same time swell to enormous proportions to engulf the whole of the net thus making any sort of passing shot bloody impossible" ... and if he had seen us play against Bicester on Friday he would have been convinced that God had indeed blessed this group of men ... all except that little guy with glasses and a cheeky grin who had one of those rackets that didn't need strings and just relied on using the edge of the frame to clunk and nudge the shuttle over the net.

We lost as expected, but again it was a superb experience, and even though we lose, we are not disgracing ourselves, and we are learning and getting better all the time (watch out Div 2 next year!!!)

The team welcomed back Steve Armstrong and a newcomer to the club Nishan had his first taste of Division 1 action. Steve and Simon led off and took 10 & 5 from their opposite number one pair, with some long drawn out rallies. The second pair was as we all found out the best pair but we still managed 3 in the first and after a slight alteration in tactics got 7 in the second. The final match saw a romping 15 to 3 victory in the first, with a more nervous 15 to 13 in the second, but as is always the case it does take a while to get used to the flight and speed of things at this level.

Steve and Kyle took 2 & 2 from the top pair but after settling into their game took the second match to three, losing to 3 in the first winning to 4 in the second, but unfortunately, as all pairs had done all night lacked consistency, and went down to 9 in the third.

Nishan and Simon came out of the blocks with plenty of energy and managed a battling 3 & 10 in the first, and although the scores didn't reflect it, played well to eventually go down to 2 & 1 in the second and finished the night with 3 & 0 in the third.

Raw scores don't do us justice, as with all our pairs, there were many occasions throughout the night when we worked hard to win the serve, but then served into the net and hit out on the second serve to give the advantage back. Mistakes at this level are punished, as we are finding out. This puts great pressure on your game, as every bad serve, mid court clear or wayward drop shot are put away clinically.

The drive back was in a pretty reflective mood, and as Cloughie didn't say but other famous footballers did ...

'I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league.' - Mark Viduka (Leeds)

'If you don't believe you can win, there is no point in getting out of bed at the end of the day.' - Neville Southall (ex-Everton)

'We lost because we didn't win.' - Ronaldo (Brazil)

'You've got to believe that you're going to win, and I believe we'll win the World Cup until the final whistle blows and we're knocked out.' - Peter Shilton (ex-England)

Thursday 25 November - Mens A - Feathers A

The heat, the heat, the legs, the feet.

The intensity of matches is noticeably higher this year. What you'd expect for Division One I guess. It could be we are getting older but then again even big Steve had beads of sweat running from him ... and believe me if anyone of us is fit by god its him. Sweat (or perspiration) ... a fluid, consisting mainly of sodium chloride (common salt) and urea in solution, secreted by the sweat glands. It is a means of excreting nitrogenous waste and of cooling the body (by evaporation).

So how was the sweat generated. Well Steve and Simon rotated around the court like men possessed. Even against the first opposition pair they worked hard and were unlucky not to pick up the spoils, losing in three. They were however able to overcome the other two pairs and set-up the team for win.

Fred and I played as second pair knowing that the first round would be all important. A win and the match would be poised ready for the taking. However we lost in three ... no excuses, just a slow start and too many un-forced errors. Having lost to the Feathers firsts we moved into the last round needing a win to give the team any chance.

My knees had been painful from the start. How could this happen tonight of all nights, our best chance of a win ? ... well I could have warmed up by walking or riding a stationary bicycle (those moving ones being really passé) ... or I could have done stretches. Stretching the muscles in the front of the thigh (quadriceps) and back of the thigh (hamstrings) reduces tension on the tendons and relieves pressure on the knee during play. Or I could have worn shoes that both fit properly and that were in good condition to help maintain balance and leg alignment when running.

And then came the blister. Blisters occur when feet get hot & sweaty, making socks stick to the feet. The sock and foot then rub against each other and the inside of the shoe. Fluid fills up a space between layers of skin to protect the area, like a small balloon. As I child I remember liking balloons ... this one I could have done without but thankfully Fred carried me though to our solitary win. ** Father Christmas please note the need for new new shoes and a stationary bicycle.

Steve and Andy showed what the team is made of ... tougher stuff and deserving more. Despite starting nervously Andy got into the swing of things and won a rubber against the opposition thirds, a creditable result considering this was Andy's first match in the A team. Little Steve was inspirational: working hard, talking to his partner and fighting for every point.

In the end a 5-4 loss. Mostly down to my performance in the first round. Report card ... must try harder.

Wednesday 15 September - Mens B - Deddington B

... 9 - 0 ... We lost !!!

Bugger, Bugger, Bugger!! Isn't this where we left off last year? Well actually no, it isn't. I am always being told that I look on the bright side of things, and if you followed Nottingham Forest you would soon realise that that's the only way to survive the frustration and torment of a season. But last night, when the Marlborough Men's B team played Deddington men there were so many things that were positive.

To start with this is the first time for many years now that our club has put out three sides in the league, showing we have a great new membership base and have strength and depth in the club. We as a club are growing! With two under 16 players and two newcomers to competitive match situations bolstered by two 'old timers' (perhaps delete that last comment Kyle, it was a slip of the tongue), we gave a very good account of ourselves which is not reflected in the final score.

Phil and Steve kicked us off in the first match and gave a good account of themselves against a pair that gave the run around to the first team just last season. Their understanding grew and pushed to 11 and 9 in the second match before injury to Phil stopped their progression.

Adam and Andy again had a slow start taking time to adjust to each other, the lighting and those bloody feathers! As with all our pairs, they made mistakes rather than were outplayed, as was reflected in the 11 and 2 in the second game. Watching the matches you would have thought they were even, and at times looked in control, but again against this team any mistakes are punished which is why the score does not truly reflect on the game. A strong 11 and 9 in the final game shows great promise for the next match.

Paul and Jim were thrown into this match and as with all our pairs took a while to get used to the unusual environment. I'm not sure if Jim and Paul have ever played with a feather and so did remarkably well to come away with any points, and their second game of 6 and 2 was well fought and again went on longer than the score suggests.

Overall it was a great night. Well done to the whole team and the supporters who travelled to watch. We thoroughly enjoyed watching our boys in action, and the whole club can take heart from the positives that came from this.

We are a growing club
We have more players than before
We have better players than before
We have a stronger financial base due to a good summer club, and the whole organisation of the club by the Committee is superb
All players in the club will benefit from our first team playing in Men's Division 1
... and of course Linda is back from a forced long term break from the game. How good is that! It's just like old times!

Wednesday 27 October - Mens B - Brackley Town

Reporter - Phil Hassell; Assistant - Judith Hassell

The Sports Hall at the End of the Universe

2nd match of the season and also an away match.

Adam was working late in London and would be touch and go whether he would make it in time. Phil had picked up Andy and Steve and told Mark and Paul that it was in the middle of Brackley. Fortunately Mark and Paul found there way there by not taking any notice of Phil. (Who takes notice of Phil anyway - Judith comment). Phil finally found the Sports Hall just before Adam arrived.

With all of the team there Marlborough were ready for action. Brackley Town were there - seasoned campaigners and home advantage would give them an edge.

Adam and Andy started off slowly but nearly took it to a third game just losing the second game to 13. Phil and Steve started off strongly winning the first game to 5 but Brackley raised their game and kept getting our good shots back. Paul and Mark started off well but the experience of the Brackley pairs showed and proved to be too strong. When down 6-0, Adam and Andy raised their game and won a rubber - first of the season.

We tried not to let our frustration show but their experience made the difference and we were learning a lot. It was Mark's first competitive match and with Paul having his second match they performed well. All looked better than the score suggested. It ended up an 8-1 defeat but wait until we get them on home territory and we have other games under our belts. For us it is all about match experience, sharpness and confidence to win. We left in high spirits and cannot wait for the next match - perhaps we could get a 7-2 or better still VICTORY!

Thursday 20 January - Mens B - BGN

Reporter - Phil Hassell; Assistant - Judith Hassell

We expected this to be hard since a number of their players come down to us during the Summer. They had already had to cancel the home match in November due to low numbers and there was a chance they may have to field a weakened team. We had already lost Andy Cobley to the Mens A Team but a new member in Jon White who had looked strong at Club Night.

It was the end of January and only our third match. The previous matches had been 9-0 and 8-1 defeats so we knew pressure was on to pull out a result. Adam R and Jon W would have been teamed up as our number one pair but Adam was at Spiceball and would be late so we made them our number three. If we were to get a victory then they needed to get all three wins. Phil H and Steve C were then number one pair and there was a debut pairing of Mark S and Tim R with Tim's first match as number two.

Phil and Steve showed a spirited performance against the BGN number one pair, and Mark and Tim excelled by winning the first game against the BGN 2nd pair but lost in three. It looked as if we were heading the same way as the previous matches.

Adam and Jon made short work of the BGN 3rd pair as we had hoped with Phil and Steve also taking their 2nd pair to three games but eventually ran out of steam. The resurgence came with Mark's smash and Tim's reach beating their 3rd pair. Adam and Jon won all three fairly comfortably and showing the confidence that we had been hoping for and it was all square waiting for the result from the last game. After a few nervous moments Phil and Steve managed to keep their focus and resulted win against their 3rd pair and a 5-4 Team win.

With a number of new players and the first year back in the League for the Mens 'B' we left Warriner on a high and hoping for further victories in the next few weeks.

Thursday 27 January - Mens B - Deddington

Reporter - Phil Hassell; Assistant - Judith Hassell

Finally our first home match of the season but this was against the top of the table Deddington Team that we had lost 9-0 at the Windmill Centre. A week before the match Phil H received a call from Mark Tyler of Deddington requesting if we could cancel for the 27th Jan and re-arrange at a later date. They had some injuries and players with work commitments in January.

I knew from our busy fixture schedule that it would be difficult to rearrange as well as finding it difficult to cancel the extra courts and asked if Mark could get another Club to swap home fixtures against us then that would be acceptable. I did not have any further call and met their six players. We had intended to play the same team as had the victory against BGN but Steve C was ill so Paul W then partnered Phil H.

Adam R and Jon W made an impressive start against the experienced Deddington number one pair, and after what seemed an eternity managed to take it to three games and win. After the performance against BGN Mark S and Tim R had been promoted to number two pair and continued their steely performance with an arduous win to three. We were already at this time concerned that we may struggle to finish the match on time. Phil H and Paul W won comfortably against their number three pair who included a junior who was gaining invaluable match experience. Mark and Tim struggled against the experience of their number one pair but Phil and especially Paul pulled off some excellent winners to beat their number two pair to three. Phil and Paul also lost to the determined number one pair but Adam and Jon showed they had formed a very good partnership with conclusive wins against their two and three pairs. Mark and Tim finished off a 7-2 Victory which showed how far we had come in a few games.

Some of the Deddington team were disappointed with the result but others appreciated that it would have been financially and practically difficult to rearrange the match.

Looking forward to the next match and perhaps blood some other players.

Thursday 30 September - Mixed - Feathers C

I so wanted to write my first match report with a witty theme. I've racked my brain trying to think of ideas, but unfortunately, when it comes down to it I don't have that talent! ... Others definitely!!! ... Enough of that.

As to the first mixed match of the season, it was of course the usual predictable run. Kyle, Simon and Steve W were as ever victorious, they made the opponents look, at best mediocre. I'll talk about the opposition later!

Whilst Amanda and Anne played well, they could not overcome the ladies, but they weren't outplayed, and the signs are good for future matches. So with the match tied at three all, as it usually is, it all came down to the mixed.

With a large crowd cheering in the background our gallant pairs went into battle. But the reality of it was Kyle and Amanda, Simon and Anne and Steve and Linda were JUST TOO GOOD! There was no battle.

So we won our first match against Feathers, whose team includes England and County juniors. Even with some switching of pairs, which did not help their cause, and as a member of the Marlborough team said (no names!) "That's taking the piss!"

We were victorious.

On a very personal note, I want to say a huge thank you. It's a great pleasure to be associated with such a fantastic club and the very special people who have supported me during a very difficult year. I am so glad to be back.

Thursday 7 October - Mixed - BGN

... and onto our second match. With one of our team already deserting us and sightseeing in Rome, would the rest of us be thrown to the lions? The simple answer was, no. Our men Kyle, Steve and Simon were awesome, did they even break into a sweat? Over three rounds they only conceded twelve points!!!!!!!

I`m sure at some stage in the season I'll be able to say the same of the ladies, but even with a superb performance from Anna (subbing for Anne on her jollies and having to play against her mum!) Amanda and I could not manage a victory.

So with the match poised at three all, it was down to the usual mixed battles. Kyle and Amanda showed the way with an impressive win, wrapping it all up for the loss of just six points. Our two remaining pairs decided to make more of a meal of it. Steve and I and Simon and Anna kept everyone in suspense and went to three. Luckily the lions weren't hungry that night and we ran out winners six games to three. Looks like we're setting a pattern already!

Next week ... guest report from Amanda Bailey.

Wednesday 13 October - Mixed - Brackley Town

The usual score, but not the usual scorers. We are used to winning 6-3 but tonight that score comprised of not one but two ladies wins ... as a certain person would say "How good is that!!!".

So it is with no apologies that in this match report the men take a back seat ... well they might get the odd mention ... but we won 2 ladies games, a feat not achieved since, well ... I am not sure when.

At the start of the game Anne was concerned about wearing the wrong knickers!! All the omens looked bad.

In the first ladies game the score looked to be following the usual predictable pattern, as Anne and Linda went 9-1 down. But then slowly but surely things began to turn around, shots were beginning to go in, points were being won, confidence was growing and some excellent spells of play were put together. The girls clawed their way back into the game, and then everything clicked into place and they took the game. This geared them up for the next game, which they took comfortably to achieve that holy grail of WINNING A LADIES RUBBER!!

Anne was then on fire going into her next game with me. We managed to take this game as well ... and the next, and another WINNING LADIES RUBBER was added to the score card. Anne - I don't think they were the wrong knickers at all!

Unfortunately Linda and I failed to take the 3rd ladies to make it a clean sweep, but that day is coming I can feel it.

In the other games, Simon Hammans & Steve comfortably saw off the opposition in the first men's game, and then Simon Hicks and Steve won their game. The score was 4-2 going into the mixed. Linda and Steve, and Anne & Simon Hammans took their mixed games, but unfortunately Simon Hicks and I couldn't get it together, and lost. However this didn't matter, as overall the score was 6-3 and we had won TWO LADIES GAMES!!!! As I quoted at the start of this report ... "How good is that!"

Wednesday 27 October - Mixed - Chipping Norton

CAPTAINS LOG (PREFERABLY CHOCOLATE!)
STAR DATE 27102004

CREW
KYLE SMITH, SIMON HAMMANS, SIMON HICKS
AMANDA BAILEY, ANNE TUSTIAN, LINDA HEAVERMAN

AWAY MISSION
TO BOLDLY GO WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE ... CHIPPY!

On a dark wintry night the away team gathered at the gates of Bloxham School for the perilous journey to Chippy. With the Captain already suffering from cramp and having to drive barefoot, things didn't look promising.

On landing the team set about reconnoitering the layout. Simon Hicks was so impressed with the pool (nothing to do with the content!) that he declared if we won 9 - 0 he would jump in naked. Well this set the tone for the rest of the evening.

We proceeded cautiously, but upon finding the main hall, we were confronted by the enemy (sorry ... opposition). After some dodgy warming up, the battle began! The first three games all went our way, even though Kyle had shaky moment in the middle, and it looked as though the next pictures posted from the mission would be naked ones!!!

But ... Simon was spared his blushes, as Amanda and I couldn't maintain the momentum, the captain was told that "we canne take any more" and the game was lost.

Losses on away missions are always hard to deal with, but fortunately this wasn't on the same scale as Mr Data. With brave performances our casualties were limited and we won the match 8 - 1.

We couldn't beam up, so we transported back to the Easington (pub) to drown our sorrows (celebrate really) with some beer, wine and lots of crisps. A veritable captains feast!

Friday 5 November - Mixed K.O. Cup - 3B's

It was in a dank, dimly lit back room of Mrs Miggins pie shop, that the handicap selection Committee of the Banbury and District Badminton Association drew their plans against Marlborough. It was Baldrick who came up with the idea, and like the Gunpowder plot itself, the plan was audacious in its simplicity. A plan so cunning you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel. Give Marlborough a crap handicap and they will lose ... well on this occasion, unlike the gunpowder plot, the plan worked!

How can you say we were stuffed in a nice way?

You can't so I won't go on!

Remember remember the 5th of November ... how can we forget?!

The night actually started quite well ... we all found our way there! But fate soon set light to our hopes and it wasn't long before the flames engulfed any chance of a victory, leaving the confidence of some of us charred and in tatters.

It was going to be a very long, short night!!!

The match started with a bang! One of those big bangs that makes your heart race and your eyes widen in terror like a startled rabbit. Steve and Anna got off to a flier. Surely we didn't actually stand a chance? Like one of those Catherine wheels that whizz and spin and jump about all over the place, so Steve and Anna worked their socks off to try and make the magical eight. Darting and flashing, twisting and smashing they rallied in all three of their games, but the 'Three B's' kept ominously gathering the points.

Nishan was a new addition to the team, and with the experience of Amanda formed a very impressive partnership. Like a pack of Rockets that you stake into the ground and retire to a safe distance, Nishan and Amanda exploded in timed intervals with power and accuracy. But again, the force of the opposition engulfed the points and the game was quickly slipping away.

Linda and Simon on paper (and in the flesh) looked a great proposition, and as it says on the box, "these can be dangerous, please handle with care!" Unfortunately, tonight the box was left with the lid off and the rain got in, leaving a rather damp and sporadic display like one of those Roman Candles that one minute bursts into life with power and delicate colour, but then suddenly splutters and spits, takes a deep breath and fizzles away.

In the end the opposition was too organised and consistent. It was like putting one of those back garden, quickly improvised Firework displays against an organised event, co-ordinated with military precision. We were destined to lose, we knew that. The handicap system is not good, and like Guy Fawkes, we were set up from the start. So much for our cup run this year! We were truly hung drawn and quartered, and left to burn at the stake.

Methinks the selection committee should carefully search the cellar of the house they next meet in! Gunpowder Treason and Plot? Sounds fine to me!

Friday 6 February - Mens - 3B's 'B' (Banbury School)

Marlborough LOSE 5 - 4. We lost !!! It's so difficult to say and even more galling to commit to paper, but we lost. We lost our first game of the season, our unbeaten run was at an end. But it was not just the fact that we lost, it was the manner in which we lost that was so upsetting. How can Steve and Simon win their first, go 13-6 up in the second and then lose in three games ? How can the combined power and vision of Fred and Steve outplay their opponents, hit shots out and into the net, go to three and lose ... twice ?

We were rubbish ! Each one of us was poor on the night, and that combined sub standard performance led to our downfall.

In the pub afterwards we consoled ourselves with reasons for our defeat, and to be honest we had a case with many of them. The floor was atrocious, there were allegations of dodgy calls which riled some members of the team to distraction, and as if that wasn't bad enough we played with feathers and it showed. The touch shots were not coming off and many shots were miss timed, all classic signs of the switch from one type of shuttle to the other ... and it did make a difference.

We were not disgraced. Losing 5-4 to such a talented team was a great achievement under the circumstances, and certainly the reaction of the opposition to the win was testament to that. They cheered and celebrated like they had won the FA Cup.

We got better towards the end and started to play with more consistency, having had time to adjust to the flight of the shuttle, the lack of traction on the floor, and the oh so dodgy calls !, but it was too late. Even a tremendous three match epic from Kyle and Ian which went right to the wire failed to tip the balance in our favour.

Wednesday 21 January - Mens - Cramic 'A' (Drayton School)

Marlborough WIN 9 - 0. Many who have witnessed these past years of the Banbury and district Badminton league have likened the story that has unfolded to that of the great tale of the 'Lord of the Rings' ... and so it was that the match played out on Wednesday 21st of January 2004 heralded the last and final part of this gripping tale.

It all began a few years ago with the fellowship of Marlborough, a group of men and women brought together from different sides of the town with a common purpose, to rid the local league of that dominating force, the all seeing power known as the 'Feathers'.

Years past and the stout hearts and supple limbs of the fellowship fought hard and long, but still the mighty lord of badminton bent its will on keeping the league and cup trophies for its own ends. Slowly the fellowship grew in strength and number, but suddenly a new and equally deadly force stirred. Across the great plains of Drayton in its white tower of its Sports Centre, the once forgotten Cramic started to gather its forces together. The time of the two Sports Centres had come !

Many battles ensued. Much blood was spilled, many swear words exchanged. From the vast plains of Drayton, across the stinking bogs to Brackley, and into the darkest dankness of Deddington the war raged !

The balance of power swung this way and that, but always the might of the Two Towers was too much for the people of Marlborough. They needed a champion and so it was that the start of the season of 2003/04 came to known as the 'Return of the King' ...

Thursday 8 January - Mixed - 3B's 'B' (Spiceball)

... It was a long week !

It seemed like the longest week of his life, and as every second passed it seemed to drag on and on lasting an eternity. What had he done wrong? Surely the light hearted literary satire he wrote a few weeks ago hadn't backfired. Surely the club that prided themselves on being friendly and fun hadn't suddenly lost their sense of humour ?!

It seemed so strange that he was being treated in this way, yet the fact of the matter was he had been dropped from the team. Minutes had passed into hours and hours dragged into days and still no word from Fred. He had been dropped !! He missed that phone call. Every week it seemed to be the one moment in his life when the pieces seemed to fit, his purpose in life had been fulfilled, he was a part of a whole, one of the chosen ones !, but alas not this week. This week was without such a moment. This week he was one of the unchosen ones, and it hurt. It hurt bitterly, it hurt deeply. Such a wound would never heal, and deep down inside, a bit of his soul lay dying, rejected, banished to the realms of 'not in the team'.

And so it came that this tortured soul dragged himself through the haze of a week without purpose, without direction, without team selection. Only one person knew how he managed, only one person was there by his side in those dark hours, and he was grateful for that ... so grateful.

But then on that fateful Thursday night, the phone let out a beep, a small pitiful sound, an excuse for a noise which failed so miserably to herald the news it had brought to it's dimly lit screen ... Kyle was where ? What the bloody hell is he doing abroad again ? He's always abroad, but ... if he is abroad and I still haven't got a call ... then who the hell is playing in my place ? It was too terrible to bear. He could contain his frustration no longer. In a whirlwind of inconsolable anger and bitterness he violently tore at the buttons on the phone and dialled in the number of the godfather, it was him and only him who could provide some form of explanation, some form of release from the pain he was feeling inside.

Margaret answered so he had to be polite ... what do you mean it's been cancelled ! Fred you daft bugger, you could have told me ! Match rescheduled for Thursday 29th January.

Monday 15 December - KO Cup - 3B's (Warriner School)

Marlborough KNOCKED-OUT. A 'David and Goliath' encounter which unfortunately went the way of the favourite. A powerful 3B's line-up lived up to expectations and thwarted all efforts to make the encounter a true match. Terrific cross-court smashes from Steve Armstrong (partnered by Amanda Bailey) and the understanding of the Simon Hammans / Anne Tustian partnership didn't get their deserved reward. Anna Hassell made her KO Cup debut and showed potential in standing up to opposition power, holding her nerve to maintain a consistent low serve. Unfortunately Anna and her partner Kyle Smith were unable to convert as many points as the other pairs and everyone was left at the end of the night, defeated and rueing the steep handicap they had faced.

Wednesday 10 December - Mixed - Cramic 'A' (Drayton School)

Marlborough LOSE 6 - 3. The first match this year using feathers and unfortunately it showed. A cold night brought the team together and the final result left them feeling just as cold when they left. The match soon looked lost when Steve Watkin and Steve Armstrong lost in the first round, although it was to the strong opposition pair of Gary Gardner and Martin Spray. The opposition Ladies pairs were too strong for Judith Hassell, Bev Varney and Ann Hawkes. Kyle Smith paired with the two Steve's managed to win both his Mens matches. He then rallied in the 3rd game of the Mixed to take that too, helped in no small part by his partner Judith who's serve was inch perfect every time. With no more successes in the last round the match was lost.

Thursday 4 December - Mens - 3B's 'B' (Spiceball)

Marlborough WIN 6 - 3. It was a Thursday night in early December. A chill was in the air and there seemed to be a spark missing from the atmosphere. The mood was sombre and tense and the hall although full seemed strangely empty. And so it was that the brave men of Marlborough entered the arena.

Six of them stood between the dastardly clan of the 3-B's and victory, a victory that would cement their position firmly at the top of the Division, and in doing so bring pride and a touch of glory to the whole club. A few wanted to win for the England Rugby team as a gesture of respect, others had no choice, driven on by pushy parents trying to live out their own failed lives in their offspring. Fred wanted to win so he could get to the bar quick as his socks always hurt his calf muscles when he ran around a lot with his socks pulled up so far! One Steve needed to win so he wouldn't get all arsy with himself and kick off again like he normally does (although not as bad as Fred does), and the other Steve needed to win cause that's all he does! (don't you just hate people who are naturally dead good at things ... except when they are on your side!!!). As for Adam and Ian, they needed to win because they were both wearing purple and had to reduce the amount of time on court as there was a serious risk of people starting to talk (I think they must have had a chat beforehand to co-ordinate!). As for me, I wanted to win for someone who couldn't be with us on the night who we were all missing terribly! The clock turned and the games began.

Thursday 27 November - Mens - Cramic 'B' (Spiceball)

Marlborough WIN 6 - 3. After a slow start the Marlborough 1st pair of Simon Hammans and Steve Armstrong moved into top gear to win all three rubbers, struggling only in their encounter against their opposite 1st's - an impressive 15-2, 15-1 win in the last round capped off the evening. The 2nd pair of Ian Poole and Kyle Smith matched the 1st pair achievement by also taking all three rubbers. Despite a solid performance and six tightly contested games the third pair of Adam Reed and Phil Hassell were unable to add to the scoreline. Bring on Cramic 'A' !

Wednesday 19 November - Mixed - Cramic 'B' (Drayton School)

Marlborough LOSE 5 - 4. The team consisting of Anne Tustian, Amanda Bailey, Judith Hassell, Steve Watkin, Steve Armstrong and Fred Poole strepped up to take on the team from Cramic. Without Linda Heaverman it wasn't going to be easy ... and it wasn't. The match lost the team paid their match fees and wound their weary way home.

Thursday 6 November - Mixed - Cramic 'B' (Spiceball)

Marlborough LOSE 5 - 4. This was a classic encounter that went right down to the wire. The first two rounds were completed as expected with the mens rubbers being won by Steve Watkin, Simon Hammans and Kyle Smith. The Ladies (Anne Tustian, Linda Heaverman, and Judith Hassell) however, despite some laudable effort, were unable to convert this to points. The mixed games were to decide the match when Steve Watkin with Linda Heaverman and Kyle Smith with Judith Hassell were unable to take their rubbers, both matches going to three games. A strong performance from Simon Hammans and Anne Tustian was rewarded with a win but as for the match, all so near and yet so far.

Thursday 23 October - Mens - Cramic 'A' (Spiceball)

Marlborough WIN 6 - 3. A match so memorable that this report just sings of the effort and skill observed on the night. This apart one of the opposition bashed his head (with his own racket - no it wasn't Steve Armstrong getting pissy !) drawing blood. The match won everyone forgot the detail and moved on, ready for the battles ahead.

Thursday 9 October - Mens - Feathers 'B' (Spiceball)

Marlborough WIN 6 - 3. So came the first mens match of the season. The line-up had all the makings on a league winning team except for the return of Kyle Smith who had been absent for the previous 2 seasons. Could this be the year they went up to Division 1 ... only time and many bloody battles would tell. The night got off to a good start with the first round seeing the boys from Marlborough take a 2 - 1 lead, the only loss being Simon Hammans and Steve Armstrong against Chris Knapp and Chris Tustian - what were these two doing in the 'B' team anyway (Chris Knapp an ex-county hopefull and Chris Tustian a current English schoolboys squad member). After the second round things were still looking good, the score having progressed to 4 - 2 ... those pesky Chris's causing another dropped point despite the efforts of Steve Watkin and Fred Poole. The final round followed in a similar manner, this time it was Ian Poole and Kyle Smith's turn to go down to the top Feathers pair. A win and a solid start to the season.

Thursday 25 September - Mixed - BGN 'A' (Spiceball)

Marlborough LOSE 5 - 4. The mixed team got back together ... surely confident after breaking the trend two weeks earlier. Only this time is was different ... well maybe not so different, just back to the old ways. The ladies (Linda Heaverman, Judith Hassell and Amanda Bailey) combined to lose all the ladies matches. The men (Steve Watkin, Steve Armstrong and Simon Hammans) did what was expected but failed to pick up 2 mixed matches resulting in the team losing. All that hope, determination and enthusiasm smashed on the rocks. If only the form of two weeks before could have been bottled on the night.

Thursday 11 September - Mixed - Deddington (Spiceball)

Marlborough WIN 7 - 2. The first match of the season brought renewed hope and enthusiasm. This year was going to be different - the old ways would be cast adrift forever. Mixed matches traditionally consist of the mens pairs winning their matches while the ladies lose, inevitably forcing the need to win 2 out of 3 mixed. This time the ladies (Linda Heaverman, Judith Hassell and Amanda Bailey) showed they were made of sterner stuff, winning ALL 3 ladies matches while the men lost all of theirs. The ladies then partnered their men (Steve Watkin, Steve Armstrong and Simon Hammans) to take the mixed and the match. What a start !

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